now i know why i became what i already was.
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
How do I convince my friend not to get tattoo tributes to her cats?
WHO DOES THAT
I told her it'd send up tons of red flags and she responded by telling me they're her babies. And she's sober.
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
there is puke in my bra ... again
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
Randomize
