ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
Sorry. My phone died in the middle of you explaining why we would never work as a couple. Whatever you were gonna say, I probably agree.
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
Randomize
