The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
I just gift wrapped bread.
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
I hopped in a random dudes car outside the strip club at 3pm on a Sunday and said "Follow that car!"
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..
Well that would explain the bones in my purse.
He said I have the “Denzel Washington” of vaginas.
Randomize