roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
I just apologized to a wet floor sign i walked into.
Randomize
