I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
I'm pregaming before our pregaming dinner...with peanut butter and beer. I think I need to re-evaluate my budget...
Just the budget?
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
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