let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
Randomize
