Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
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