they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
we got kicked out of McDonald's because you kept screaming THAT SHIT CRAY at the woman in front of us because she ordered a fish filet.
...that shit cray.
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
Dude I woke up with a handprint shaped bruise on my ass, a pong ball in my cleavage, and somebody else's gold chain around my neck. Who's house am I in?
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