Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
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