im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
Found plan b box covered with blood. In kitchen sick. Pickle jar is empty. Wtf happened?
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
Randomize
