I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
Umm I'm too high to move.
ha. weirdest feeling ever. just wiped my ass with my non-dominant hand. (eating cheeseburger with right one)
Your grandmother is in heaven weeping.
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
I've made a new rule for socializing in the winter: if it doesn't involve me orgasming or getting drunk I can't make it
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
Randomize
