We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
MY COWORKER IS ATTRACTIVE AND I DROPPED A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG JOKE IN CONVERSATION I FUCKED UP
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
Randomize
