We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
You were screaming across the bar "BUYING US SHOTS ISN'T GOING TO MAKE US STRAIGHT, YA KNOW!!!!!!!!"
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
You got her pregnant one week before your vasectomy? You couldn't wait one week to cheat on me?
As an added realisation of today. If we used the last time I got laid as a conceiving date I would have a two week old baby. It's been too long...
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
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