"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
Dude I just ripped my new jeans climbing out the window so his booty call wouldn't realize I was home. Being his roommate should come with hazard pay
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
I woke up at 2 AM to find them in my living room with a radio flyer wagon full of milk glass plates and a Holstein cow. How am I going to explain this to my landlord!?!
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
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