why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
You both snapchatted me that. Like, I just got a double dose of penis pastry.
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
Oh man. I threw up in the first cab. Got kicked out. Roamed somewhere for awhile. Fell asleep in the back if the second cab. Woke up in my underwear on the living room floor with a frozen pizza (thawed) laying next to me
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
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