operation harelip BJ is a go
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
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