all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
sorry didn’t mean to call you, i was just trying to put the t-rex emoji beside your name
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
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