so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
Why did I wake up in bed with the ironing board and a Mariah Carey mask? Vodka hates me
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
Randomize
