Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
Randomize
