lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
Randomize
