OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
"Nobody needs to know that I have a vibrating butt plug and nobody needs to know that I'm probably gonna start wearing it at work"
Oh, btw, UPS might come by. Drunk me ordered us $75 worth of gummy airhead starburst type candies. Whatever it is, it'll be delicious.
You came in yelling "I'm el scorcho" and then axe can flamethrowered my dresser. Awesomeness aside, you owe me a new dresser.
Randomize
