Rescue me. My white trash great uncle just pulled out his belly at the restaurant to show us how big this woman's tit was
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
I wanted to dispute a few 411 charges on my phone bill. The service rep told me I called them four times asking for Lady Gaga's number.
Friend I haven't seen in almost a year just IMed me to let me know that my mom stuck her boob out the window on the freeway at her.
Her mom responded by mooning my mother. I really don't know what's worse.
so explain to me why i woke up in jail this morning
because you opened a jar or pickles and a bag of fritos and layed down in the middle of aisle 7 while singing 'la cucaracha'
no more ever clear
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
Randomize
