I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
when a girl says 'did you just try to kiss me' you should leave the bar. trust me.
Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
Me and your penis are best friends. You don't know it, but I whisper my secrets whenever I give you blowjobs. We even have a secret handshake. We can't be separated from each other. We just can't.
sick fucks of a feather flock together
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
I just ran your car into a ups truck....but on a up note I have a handle of fireball and breakfast burritos
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
omg how embarrassing to not hear the delivery person knocking because you're singing "where are you Pizza" to the tune of "where are you christmas" too loudly
Showed up to the airport to find my fuck buddy is on the same flight. Do you think he'd be intertested in the mile high club?
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
Randomize
