some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
Randomize
