I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
I'm trying to convey to the smoking hot Spanish cleaning lady at work that I want to bone her but I think it's getting lost in translation. How do you say "blowjob" in Spanish?
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
Randomize
