i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
Shitshow foam night was such a success
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
Help me. My dealer just asked me to have a child with him. Sat me down for a heart to heart "he's almost 40 and losing his shit cause he's single and wants babies" talk. How the fuck am I supposed to feel about this????
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
Randomize
