oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
If Megan asks I spilled my water water all over her. I pissed on your roommate. You're welcome. I expect you to keep that on the down low. Seriously tell her the water thing
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
You know when your cat drags a dead bird into the the house as a present and drops it at your feet looking all pleased because it thinks you'll be pleased? That's what sex with him was like.
Being drunk at Chick-fil-A is a dystopian experience
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
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