I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
I woke up and she had washed, dried, folded my clothes, cooked me breakfast, and had started cleaning my room
haha, you sure you didnt fuck your mom?
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
jacking off on stolen wireless... gotta enjoy the small things in life
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize