Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
I think drunk me is telling hungover me something... I just have to crack the code.
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
Is it weird that my ex and the dude I'm talking to now both only have one testicle? Apparently I've found my type..
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
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