I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
Last night she showed me how to clean my bowl and now she's drunk making peanut butter filled cookies. Best. Roommate. Ever.
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
My ass is underappreciated
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
I'm armed with nothing but $4 lip gloss gum and my phone. Ready to take on the fucking world.
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
Randomize
