I hate all girls vehemently.
I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
No, you don't understand. If the words "stop," "alcohol poisoning," and "regret" aren't in the same sentence by the end of the night, I will have failed this birthday.
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
Things bear mace does not do: repel bears. Things bear mace does do: piss off bears, give bystanders asthma attacks. Lesson learned
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
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