he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
You got ahold of his prescription papers and gave out prescriptions for cranberry and vodka
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
I hope dressing like a sexy, but very grown up and intelligent, secretary while out shopping helps disguise how high I am right now.
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
Randomize
