Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
His fridge was full of blocks of pepperjack cheese, and his pantry was stocked with huge jars of jellybeans. Even if I'd been drunk, I don't think I could've made that up.
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
Randomize