Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
I'm semi drunk. I just bought you penis moisturizer. Not kidding. Keep an eye out for the package. Merry Christmas.
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
Randomize
