I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
I sat on my couch last night watching What Women Want, eating ice cream, and sobbing "why doesn't she like me?" Why was I born a man?
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
I guess I called her at 2am, demanding that she bring us food. She told us to order pizza, and I yelled "DON'T MENTION PIZZA!" I recall nothing.
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
Randomize
