Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
"I never want to have to say, 'Please don't squirt me with your breast milk' again.
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
Spilled red wine all over my bed. This has to be the fiftieth time ive refused to fall asleep without a drink in my hand
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
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