So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
After throwing up in a tequila bottle on my nightstand (still not sure how she did that) she asked if she could slip into something more comfortable.
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
He was so fat that he broke two of my ribs
Maybe it's time to stop screaming I'm a chubby chaser every time you enter a drinking establishment
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
