I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
Of course I have a pirate flag
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
Randomize
