We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
He was using OnStar to get directions to the bar. I'm pretty sure he'd have gotten her number too if I hadn't disconnected the call.
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
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