You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
I can't believe you're forcing me to handle this hangover sober
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
Randomize
