Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
Our relationship is like that beach boys song "help me Rhonda" and I'm fucking Rhonda. And Rhondas's the whore in case you've never heard it.
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
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