and then I told her I was too drunk. She started to cry, and told me this always happens to her and that she thinks shes ugly. I pretended I was asleep and then she farted.
Quick, to the slutcave!
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
I asked her why she was drunkenly masturbating to Iron Man and all she replied was "Robert Downey Jr". As far as excuses go, that seemed pretty legit.
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
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