just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
I think the universe has a conglomeration of sentences reserved only for me.
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
Randomize
