Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
Woke up to a bouquet of flowers in my toilet bowl. Drunk hubby loves me.
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
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