so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
Omphalophobia is a real thing. don't ever fucking touch my belly button again dude
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
It's 2 am on the long weekend and what am I doing? Sitting alone in my room eating chips and queso and watching Rio. Fuck I need to get laid.
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Randomize