Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
It's 1 AM and there's a guy outside my house belting out Bennie and The Jets. He stops in between verses to puke. I'm joining him.
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
Sometimes I feel like I should become a beautician purely for my ability to shave pretty shapes into my pubic hair.
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
They were out of watermelon smirnoff, so we got you a fifth of 5 o'clock and an actual watermelon.
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
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