it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize
