Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
And I was chasing apple pie moonshine (provided by cops) with bud light limeys. In a golf cart, wearing a tiara.
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
Randomize
