Are we in a gay sports bar?
Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
can we get nightvision for the apartment?
i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
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