Kiss
Puke
im having a threesome with these popsicles
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
Coffee's working. Just killed a fly with my bare hands.\nFuck with me.
Randomize
