god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
The fact that I found him in his Ninja Turtles t-shirt next to six empty and obviously consumed packs of EasyMac watching reruns of Becker certainly made telling him that I wanted a divorce so much easier than I had planned.
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
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